A FEW SMIRKS

WARNING
FOR MATURE READERS ONLY

So kids, if your parents should walk in while you're reading this, just click here and say this to them:

"With the falling dollar, the rising gold index and runaway crude oil prices. Shouldn't the two of you be reviewing your 401-k options?"

---

1.) Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?

Ask your mother.

---

2) How do you embarrass an archeologist?

Give him a tampon and ask him which period it came from.

---

3) What's the difference between a bitch and a whore?

A whore sleeps with everybody at the party; A bitch sleeps with everybody at the party, except you.

---

4) What's the difference between love, true love, and showing off?

Spitting, swallowing, and gargling.

---

5) What's the difference between a Catholic wife and a Jewish wife?

A Catholic wife has real orgasms and fake jewelry.

---

6) What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?

The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

---

7) What is the biggest problem for an atheist?

No one to talk to during orgasm.

---

8) What do you call an Amish guy with his hand up a horse's ass?

A mechanic.

---

9) Who is the most popular guy at the nudist colony?

The guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen donuts.

---

10) Who is the most popular girl at the nudist colony?

The one who can eat the last donut.

---

11) Jewish dilemma:

Free PORK.

---

12) The three words men hate to hear most during sex:

"Are you in?"

---

13) The three words women hate to hear most during sex:

"Honey, I'm home!"

---

---

---

---

---

---

---

==============================================

Later.....

Wil
=8^))
"Let's all be careful out there!"