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Tuesday, March 23, 2004


whoever rows the boat doesn't have time to rock it.


Main's Law: For every action there is an equal and opposite government program.


Death benefits = oxymoron


Patience abused becomes fury


I'm terribly sorry, but I'm afraid you're just a mirage.

Will Rogers, who died in a plane crash with Wylie Post in 1935, was probably the greatest political sage the United States has ever known.


Enjoy the following quotes:

1. Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.

2. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

3. There are 2 theories to arguing with a woman,

.......neither works.

4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

5. Always drink upstream from the herd.

6. If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

7. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket.

8. There are three kinds of men:

.....The ones who learn by reading.

.....The few who learn by observation.

.....The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence.

9. Good judgment comes from experience and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

10. If you're riding ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.

11. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back.

12. After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.
1. Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

2. The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.

3. Some people try to turn back their odometers.

Not me. I want people to know "why" I look this way.

I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.

4. When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.

5. You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.

6. I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.

7. One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young.

8. One must wait until evening to see how splendid the day has been.

9. Being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.

10. Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft.

........Today its called golf.

11. If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you are old.

Today is Tuesday, March 23rd

The 83rd day of 2004.

There are 283 days left in the year.


Today's Highlight in History:

On March 23, 1775, Patrick Henry made his famous call for American independence from Britain, telling the Virginia Provincial Convention, "Give me liberty, or give me death!"


On this date:

In 1066, 18th recorded perihelion passage of Halley's Comet.

In 1792, Joseph Haydn's Symphony No. 94 in G Major (the "Surprise" symphony) was performed publicly for the first time, in London.

In 1794, U.S.A.'s first patent was granted to Joseph G. Pierson for a riveting machine.

In 1806, explorers Lewis and Clark, having reached the Pacific coast, began their journey back east.

In 1868, The University of California is founded in Oakland, California.

In 1889, U.S. President Harrison opened Oklahoma for white colonization.

In 1908, Academy Award actress Joan Crawford (Lucille LeSueur) was born in San Antonio, TX. She appeared in more than 70 films. She died in 1977.

In 1912, Scientist and engineer Wernher Von Braun was born. He died Jun 16, 1977 at the age of 65.

In 1912, the Dixie Cup was invented.

In 1919, Benito Mussolini founded his Fascist political movement in Milan, Italy.

In 1925, Tennessee bans the teaching of evolution in schools; teacher John Scopes ignores the ban and is later prosecuted in the so-called "Monkey Trial."

In 1929, The first telephone is installed in the White House.

In 1933, the German Reichstag adopted the Enabling Act, which effectively granted Adolf Hitler dictatorial legislative powers.

In 1940, The 1st radio broadcast of "Truth or Consequences" on CBS

In 1942, during World War II, the U.S. government began evacuating Japanese-Americans from their West Coast homes to detention centers.

In 1950, "Beat the Clock" premiered on CBS-TV.

In 1956, Pakistan became an independent republic within the British Commonwealth.

In 1956, Sudan became independent.

In 1965, America's first two-person space flight began as Gemini III blasted off from Cape Kennedy with astronauts Virgil I. Grissom and John W. Young aboard.

In 1967, The 100th episode of "Bewitched" was aired on ABC.

In 1972, Evil Knievel breaks 93 bones after successfully jumping 35 cars on his motorcycle.

In 1973, The last airing of "Concentration" took place. The show had been on NBC for 15 years.

In 1983, President Reagan first proposed developing technology to intercept enemy missiles -- a proposal that came to be known as the Strategic Defense Initiative, as well as "Star Wars."

In 1983, Dr. Barney Clark, recipient of a permanent artificial heart, died at the University of Utah Medical Center after 112 days with the device.

In 1998, Germany's largest bank pledged $3.1 million to Jewish foundations as restitution for Nazi looting.

In 1998, The U.S. Supreme Court allowed term limits for state lawmakers.

In 2001, Russia's orbiting Mir space station ended its 15-year odyssey with a fiery plunge into the South Pacific.

Ten years ago (1994):

Luis Donaldo Colosio, Mexico's leading presidential candidate, was assassinated in Tijuana.

Twenty-three paratroopers were killed when a F-16 fighter jet and C-130 transport collided while landing at Pope Air Force Base in North Carolina and the F-16 skidded into another transport on the ground.

Wayne Gretzky broke Gordie Howe's National Hockey League career record with his 802nd goal.

Actress Giulietta Masina died in Rome at age 73.

Five years ago (1999):

NATO Secretary-General Javier Solana gave the formal go-ahead for airstrikes against Serbian targets following the failure of Kosovo peace talks.

One year ago (2003):

A U.S. Army maintenance convoy was ambushed in Iraq; 11 soldiers were killed, seven were captured, including Pfc. Jessica Lynch.

A U.S. Air Force helicopter crashed in Afghanistan, killing all six people on board.

Grenades exploded at the 101st Airborne command center in Kuwait, killing two officers; a U.S. soldier was detained as a suspect.

At the Academy Awards, "Chicago" won best picture; "The Pianist" won best director for Roman Polanski and best actor for Adrien Brody; Nicole Kidman won best actress for "The Hours."


Today's Birthdays:

Comedian Marty Allen is 82.

Movie director Mark Rydell is 70.

Singer-producer Ric Ocasek is 55.

Actress Corrine Clery is 54.

Singer Chaka Khan is 51.

Comedian (?) Louie Anderson is 51.

Actress Amanda Plummer is 47.

Actress Hope Davis is 40.

Comedian John Pinnett is 40.

Actor Richard Grieco is 39.

Country musician Kevin Griffin (Yankee Grey) is 39.

Rock singer-musician Damon Albarn (Blur) is 36.

Actress-singer Melissa Errico is 34.

Rock musician John Humphrey (The Nixons) is 34.

Actress Keri Russell is 28.

Actress Nicholle Tom is 26.

Country singer Paul Martin (Marshall Dyllon) is 26.


Thought for Today:

"A conscience which has been bought once will be bought twice." -

- Norbert Wiener, American mathematician (1894-1964).