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Tuesday, March 30, 2010


Which generation are you?
1926 - 1945         "The Quiet Generation" .
1946 - 1965         "Baby Boomers"            .
1966 - 1985         "Gen X"                         .
1986 - 2005         "The Y Generation"       .
 2006 - 2025         (Yet To Be Determined)   .

I think I know how "The 'Y' Generation" received that moniker.....

"Let's all be careful out there!"

Japanese Eye Test

Can't read it?  Try pulling the outer edges of your eyes towards the nearest ear.  Try harder.  The more you look Japanese the easier it is to read.

"Let's all be careful out there!"


"Let's all be careful out there!"

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Remember When Jokes Were Funny? "Duck Hunting"

"Let's all be careful out there!"

The One That Didn't Get Away: A Fish Story


"Let's all be careful out there!"

1959 Chevrolet Bel Air vs. 2009 Chevrolet Mailbu: Head-on collision

"Let's all be careful out there!"

An Interesting Mail Box in Oklahoma

"Let's all be careful out there!"

Wednesday, March 24, 2010


"Let's all be careful out there!"

To Kill an American

Another of those "PLEASE FORWARD" e-mails I get everyday

(allegedly) Written by an Australian Dentist

You probably missed this in the rush of news, but there was actually a report that someone in Pakistan had published in a newspaper, an offer of a reward to anyone who killed an American, any American.

So an Australian dentist wrote an editorial the following day to let everyone know what an American is, so they would know when they found one. (Good one, mate!!!!)

'An American is English, or French, or Italian, Irish, German, Spanish , Polish, Russian or Greek. An American may also be Canadian, Mexican, African, Indian, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Australian, Iranian, Asian, or Arab, or Pakistani or Afghan.

An American may also be a Comanche, Cherokee, Osage, Blackfoot, Navaho, Apache, Seminole or one of the many other tribes known as native Americans.

An American is Christian, or he could be Jewish, or Buddhist, or Muslim. In fact, there are more Muslims in America than in Afghanistan . The only difference is that in America they are free to worship as each of them chooses.

An American is also free to believe in no religion.  For that he will answer only to God, not to the government, or to armed thugs claiming to speak for the government and for God.

An American lives in the most prosperous land in the history of the world.  The root of that prosperity can be found in the Declaration of Independence , which recognizes the God given right of each person, to the pursuit of happiness.

An American is generous.. Americans have helped out just about every other nation in the world in their time of need, never asking a thing in return.

When Afghanistan was over-run by the Soviet army 20 years ago, Americans came with arms and supplies to enable the people to win back their country!

As of the morning of September 11, Americans had given more than any other nation to the poor in Afghanistan .  The national symbol of America , The Statue of Liberty , welcomes your tired and your poor, the wretched refuse of your teeming shores and the homeless. These in fact are the people who built America.

Some of them were working in the Twin Towers the morning of September 11 , 2001 earning a better life for their families. It's been told that the World Trade Center victims were from at least 30 different countries, cultures, and first languages, including those that aided and abetted the terrorists.

So you can try to kill an American if you must. Hitler did. So did General Tojo , and Stalin , and Mao Tse-Tung, and other blood-thirsty tyrants in the world.. But, in doing so you would be killing yourself. Because Americans are not a particular people from a particular place.  They are the embodiment of the human spirit of freedom. Everyone who holds to that spirit, is an American.

"Let's all be careful out there!"

Thursday, March 18, 2010


Which is why I'm wishing everybody a
Happy St. Patrick's Day 
a day late.

"Let's all be careful out there!"

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Anybody Want To Go Phishing?

Okay, I mentioned about those "please forward..." e-mails the other day.  And, lo & behold, I get this one (below)  Now the version I received was done up so pretty and professionally that it just enticed everyone who read  it to instantly fill in their answers to the questions and send it along.  Of course, the spammer/phishers received a copy of it and all the e-mails that it was sent to.  Think of what a crook could do with all that personal information.  I responded back to my friend, message included below, and gave the spammer/phishers some answers that they probably won't know how to process.

Subject: 2010 quiz
Becky. I am just returning this to you with a warning that these type of e-mails are used by large companies for spam & phishing purposes. READ THIS ARTICLE. Everything that someone answers is collected as data. You might get a kick out of my answers though.


Welcome to the 2010 edition of getting to know your Friends. ' press FORWARD ' then change all the answers so they apply to you, and then send this to your friends including the person who sent it to you. The theory is that you will learn a lot of little things about your friends that you might not have known!

1.What time did you get up this morning?
2. Diamonds or pearls
Well, diamonds are a girl's best friend, so that can't apply to me and you cast pearls before swine. Now I was called "pig" often when I was a cop but that probably doesn't apply
3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema?
What the heck is a cinema? This is America, we don't go to cinemas, we go to the movies.
4. What is your favorite TV show?
Don't own a TV
5. What do you usually have for breakfast?
I usually eat a light breakfast. You know, a half dozen eggs, a side of bacon, a half dozen potatoes (fried in grease with onions), some toasted sourdough bread (about a loaf or so), A gallon of coffee, a quart of milk and a quart of OJ. More than that just makes me feel groggy the rest of the day
6. What is your middle name
Now this one is definitely a spammer's phishing trick. Isn't it?
7. What food do you dislike?
I've never met a food I wouldn't eat.
8. What is your favorite CD at moment?
I don't have a CD player, an mp3 player, a radio nor any other sound playback system. I like peace & quiet
9. What kind of car do you drive?
Since I am basically blind, I consider it my responsibility to neither own nor operate a motor vehicle. Unless, of course, you want to give me yours.
10. Favorite sandwich?
11. What characteristic do you despise?
Companies that send out e-mails like this so they can use the embedded tracker to garner valid e-mail addresses to spam me with. And this one collects a lot of personal info that identity thieves can use also
12..Favorite item of clothing?
String bikinis on young nubile lasses
13. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go?
Been there, done that
14. Favorite brand of clothing?
15. Where would you retire to?
I am already retired, so what difference does it make?
16.What was your most memorable birthday?
The last one. With my health conditions, each one, especially the next, is important
17. Favorite sport to watch?
Olympic curling. It is so peaceful and quiet and doesn't disturb my sleep
18. Furthest place you are sending this?
If I told you, I'd have to kill you.
19. Person you expect to send it back first?
That information is available on "need to know" basis
20.When is your birthday?
On the same day every year
21. Are you a morning person or a night person?
I am retired. I am an "awake" and "asleep" person. Check your local listings for time and channel
22. What is your shoe size?
Why in heavens name would anyone, except spammers/phishers, be interested in that? They're bigger than a ballerina's and smaller than Shaq's
23. Pets?
Only if she is drunk enough to let me
24. Any new and exciting news you 'd like to share with us
I may have won the Publisher's Clearing House Grand Prize. Oh, yeah. Some guy in Nigeria wants to give me a Gazzillion Dollars to help him
25. What did you want to be when you were little?
26.How are you today?
Everybody asks this question but does anyone really care?
27.What is your favorite candy?
Candy Clark
28.What is your favorite flower?
I am allergic to flowers
29.What is a day on the calendar you are looking forward to?
30.What's your full name?
What are you? Homeland Security?
31.What are you listening to now?
My farts
32. What was the last thing you ate?
Whatever wasn't moving in the refrigerator
33. Do you wish on stars?
Yeah. I pray that Claire Bennett would spend the night with me.
34.If you were a crayon, what color would you be?
I am colorblind
35.How is the weather right now?
Dark. Followed by increasing light towards dawn
36.The first person you spoke to on the phone today
No one.
37. Favorite soft drink?
38. Favorite restaurant?
Those with an "Early Bird" special
39. Real hair color?
Yeah, whats left of it is real
40. What was your favorite toy as a child?
Whatever my sibling was playing with.
41. Summer or winter?
If you can't tell the difference, does it really matter?
42.Hugs or kisses
I love it when a girl hugs my scrotum and kisses my penis
43. Chocolate or Vanilla?
What is this, a racist thing? Why can't we all just get along
44. Coffee or tea?
Both of these are products produced in foreign countries. Buying them wastes and depletes our international trade balance.

45. Do you want your friends to email you back
Sure but not using this blatant spam/phishing piece of crap
46. When was the last time you cried?
The day my wife left me. Tears of joy for hours.
47. What is under your bed?
You mean besides my money? Can't really trust banks, can you?
48. What did you do last night?
Probably the same thing as everybody else.
49. What are you afraid of ?
Lets see. I've been married, been a cop, been in battle and raised children. I don't think there is really anything that makes me afraid.
50. Salty or sweet?
Salty or sweet what?
51. How many keys on your key ring?
more than one and less than a google
52. How many years at your current job?
53. Favorite day of the week?
The next one
54. How many towns have you lived in?
Would you be a little more specific, please. I grew up "military" and have lived in towns, on bases, in cities, in villages, in townships, out in the country and on islands. Never made it into space though
55. Do you make friends easily?
Are you questioning my ability to "play well" with others?
56. How many people will you send this to?
For that information I'll need to see a warrant
57. How many will send this back?
I Hope None

"Let's all be careful out there!"

Tuesday, March 16, 2010


Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina
dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog and was in the
checkout line when woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had, an elephant?

So since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me.

I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's ass and a car hit us both.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

Costco won't let me shop there anymore.

Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say.

"Let's all be careful out there!"

Monday, March 15, 2010

Good Information and Advice

Thought this interesting enough to share with all of you......FYI.......
The man that first sent this information is a computer tech. He spends a lot of time clearing the junk off computers for people and listens to complaints about speed. All forwards are not bad, just some. Be sure you read the very last paragraph.

He wrote:

By now, I suspect everyone is familiar with and/or for determining whether information received via email is just that: true/false or fact/fiction. Both are excellent sites.

Advice from VERY IMPORTANT!!

1) Any time you see an email that says "forward this on to '10' (or however many) of your friends", "sign this petition", or "you'll get bad luck" or "you'll get good luck" or "you'll see something funny on your screen after you send it" or whatever --- it almost always has an email tracker program attached that tracks the cookies and emails of those folks you forward to. The host sender is getting a copy each time it gets forwarded and then is able to get lists of 'active' email addresses to use in SPAM emails or sell to other spammers. Even when you get emails that demand you send the email on if you're not ashamed of God/Jesus --- that is email tracking, and they are playing on our conscience. These people don't care how they get your email addresses - just as long as they get them. Also, emails that talk about a missing child or a child with an incurable disease "how would you feel if that was your child" --- email tracking. Ignore them and don't participate!

2) Almost all emails that ask you to add your name and forward on to others are similar to that mass letter years ago that asked people to send business cards to the little kid in Florida who wanted to break the Guinness Book of Records for the most cards. All it was, and all any of this type of email is, is a way to get names and 'cookie' tracking information for telemarketers and spammers -- to validate active email accounts for their own profitable purposes.

You can do your Friends and Family members a GREAT favor by sending this information to them. You will be providing a service to your friends. And you will be rewarded by not getting thousands of spam emails in the future!

Do yourself a favor and STOP adding your name(s) to those types of listing regardless how inviting they might sound! Or make you feel guilty if you don't! It’s all about getting email addresses and nothing more.

You may think you are supporting a GREAT cause, but you are NOT!

Instead, you will be getting tons of junk mail later and very possibly a virus attached! Plus, we are helping the spammers get rich! Let's not make it easy for them!

ALSO: Email petitions are NOT acceptable to Congress of any other organization - i.e. social security, etc. To be acceptable, petitions must have a "signed signature" and full address of the person signing the petition, so this is a waste of time and you are just helping the email trackers.

"Let's all be careful out there!"

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Having Some Fun...

And I Learned Something New

Like a lot of you I get many PowerPoint presentations sent to me. Most are fantastic, The only problem is that there isn't a way to put them on your blog and there is no URL that you can hyper-link to. Yesterday I discovered that I can convert a .pps file to a Google Document, publish it and embed the results here. There is one small drawback in that Google Docs doesn't import the audio portion of the .pps file. This does degrade the impact of the presentation but I can live with that.

The 10 posts below this one are the conversions that I've done. Treat it like any embedded video file. Press PLAY and then expand to FULL SCREEN.

Some are absolutely stunning and others are humorous. WARNING: SOME CONTAIN NUDITY! Those will have a notification alert at the top of the post.

I hope you enjoy them.

"Let's all be careful out there!"

Mirror in the Water

"Let's all be careful out there!"

Close Your Eyes....

And go back...

"Let's all be careful out there!"

Your Health: Part 1


"Let's all be careful out there!"

45 Lessons in Life

"Let's all be careful out there!"

God's Pharmacy

"Let's all be careful out there!"

Friday, March 12, 2010

Wonderful Photos

"Let's all be careful out there!"