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Saturday, February 21, 2009

We all need a good laugh right about now...

Subject: Farm Kid in Marines

Perspective, perspective, perspective!
(read thru to the punchline ending!)

FARM KID in Marines

Dear Ma and Pa,

I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell them to join up quick before all of the places are filled.

I was restless at first because you get to stay in bed
till nearly 6 a.m. But I am getting so I like to sleep late.
Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth
your cot, and shine some things. No hogs to slop, feed to
pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically

>> Men got to shave but it is not so bad, there's warm
water. Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice,
cereal, eggs, bacon, etc., but kind of weak on chops,
potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie and other regular
food, but tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit by the two
city boys that live on coffee. Their food, plus yours,
holds you until noon when you get fed again. It's no
wonder these city boys can't walk much.

>> We go on 'route marches,' which the platoon
sergeant says are long walks to harden us. If he thinks so,
it's not my place to tell him different. A 'route
march' is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then
the city guys get sore feet and we all ride back in trucks.

>> The sergeant is like a school teacher. He nags a lot.
The Captain is like the school board. Majors and colonels
just ride around and frown. They don't bother you none.

>> This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep
getting medals for shooting. I don't know why. The
bulls-eye is near as big as a chipmunk head and don't
move, and it ain't shooting at you like the Higgett boys
at home. All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and
hit it. You don't even load your own cartridges They
come in boxes.

>> Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training.
You get to wrestle with them city boys. I have to be real
careful though, they break real easy. It ain't like
fighting with that ole bull at home. I'm about the best
they got in this except for that Tug Jordan from over in
Silver Lake . I only beat him once.. He joined up the same
time as me, but I'm only 5'6' and 130 pounds and
he's 6'8' and near 300 pounds dry.

>> Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before
other fellers get onto this setup and come stampeding in.

Your loving daughter,

To each and every one of you who has sent me a donation. THANK YOU

I am about 3/4s of the way to covering March's rent. Without your kindness, I wouldn't even be thinking of the possibility of actually being able to do that.

"Let's all be careful out there!"