FINALLY!

SOMETHING RESEMBLING "NORMAL"

I have had a pretty decent week, so far. While the mileage has varied quite a bit, the meter has been consistently in the mid-$200's This is about 20% below what I normally got for a night on prior Holiday periods (adjusted as necessary for the rate change on January 6th, this year).

Looks like I'll meet my obligations this month by working New Years Eve. I am so close to meeting my goal, just not close enough. Feces occurs [sigh].

The only lull period last night was between 11:00pm and Midnight. Before and after that break we were "Rockin' 'n' Rollin' ".At some points the wait for a cab did pass 30 minutes, but that was not too frequent nor long most of the shift. While we often had no available cabs, the call frequency was varying enough that we had one "clearing" when the next call came in. That makes it easier for me to dispatch. Waaay easier.

The tourists finally started going out for dinner and bar hopping last night. It was the first night this season that the volume of tourist business exceeded the "local" runs. $10 to $15 fares typically hand you a Twenty and "keep the change". For the $5 to $7 fares it was a Ten with the same instructions. Of course there were exceptions. $13 on a $12.80 and $20 on a $6.50. Hate the former. Love the later.

Not one unusual nor obnoxious passenger the entire shift. Now thats rare!
Even the callers were pretty much intelligent. Only had to [click] one call.

A profitable but boring night.

---

THE PICTURE GALLERY

O'AHU

Skylight Of The Territorial Office Building

Iolani Palace Grounds

Playing Chess On Waikiki Beach

S.S. Independence

~No Longer In Service~

S.S. Independence
As Seen From Aloha Tower

Southeast O'ahu
Halona Blowhole

Southeast O'ahu
Halona Cove

Southeast O'ahu
Hanauma Bay Entrance

Southeast O'ahu
Hanauma Bay
State Underwater Park

Southeast O'ahu
Makapu'u Point

Southeast O'ahu
Waimanalo Beach Park

Statue Of A Hula Dancer
At The Base Of Aloha Tower

Submarine U.S.S. Bowfin

Surfboards For Rent
On Waikiki Beach

Surfers At Waikiki

Surfers On The Beach

***

"Let's all be careful out there!"

HOW MUCH IS IT GOING TO COST

ME TO GET THERE?

Picked up two young ladies a bit after 4:00am in central Kihei.

"Where are we headed to ladies?"
"Take us to Fred's."
"Okay, Fred's it is."
"Actually we aren't going to Fred's, our condo is just past there."
"What's the name of your condo?"
"We can't remember but its just past Fred's. We'll recognize it when we see it."
"Not a problem. Just tell me when to turn."
"How much is it going to cost me to get there?
"Gee. Since I have no idea where we are headed, its kinda hard to give you an estimate."
"Thats okay. Just give me a rough guess. I hope I have enough to pay you."
"Lady, the meter trips at $3.50 and then its 30 cents per 1/10th of a mile after that."
"Good. I have enough."

Their destination was about a mile south of "Fred's". Gave me $16 on a $10.10.

They spoke very softly with each other as we rode and one said something about both of them having been good. At least one of them had been very good. The car reeked of sex.

*** *** ***

THINGS TO CONSIDER

• When approached by three locals, while walking through an isolated parking lot, who ask you for a cigarette, DO NOT stick your hand into your pocket to fetch your pack. Doing so leaves you with one less arm to defend yourself with as you get "sucker punched" and then kicked and beaten and stomped. You will also get a ride to the Emergency Room at MMMC.
• When you meet that great new friend or special someone at the "Triangle", DO NOT accept their offer for a walk, in the dark, along the water in Kalama Park. Unless you really enjoy being gang raped. Gender isn't a factor in this issue.
• When patronizing our most popular "locals" bar, please remember that smiling at, speaking to, dancing with, or flirting with any "local" girl will probably result in having your "privates" handed to you by six huge "local" males when you retire to the restroom.
• That great guy who is going to sell you some "smoke" would really rather just take your money and run. Anything he gives you will have a THC content of zero. If you should decide to go back to "his place" to "do a couple of bowls", please make sure that you have the name and phone number of your next-of-kin tattooed somewhere on your body. It makes the Medical Examiner's job so much easier.

I hope these handy little hints will make your visit to Mau'i a bit more enjoyable.

*** *** ***

I have no idea what their names are nor where they are from. I had these two pretty girls in the cab recently and they kept taking my picture (well, I DID look like Santa) so I took theirs.

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THE PICTURE GALLERY

HONOLULU ZOO

Marker Showing Mileage to Other World Zoos

Giraffe

Greater Kudu

Gunther's Dikdik - Dwarf Antelope

Hippopotamus

Indian Elephant

Komodo Dragon

Nēnē
Hawai'i State Bird

Nile Crocodile

Nile Monitor Lizard

Savanna Monitor Lizard

Siamang Gibbon

Statue Of A Pair Of Dolphins

Sumatran Tiger

Waterbuck

White-Handed Gibbon

***

"Let's all be careful out there!"

THE PERFECT ...

ASSHOLE

Stayed active until about 10:00pm. Even though it was Kimo's (#22) night to dispatch, Tina (#5) had possession of the phone when the owner transferred the calls. She did a fantastic job. She and Kimo never were able to connect and she had the "duty" until she went home, about 11:00pm. Then it came to me. Okay.

Things that really frustrate me about dispatching is the idiots who call. The closer we get to bar close, the stupidier callers become.

After midnight, we had three cabs on the road. We were staying active. A lady calls from the far north end of town. It was a good run. I gave her a time element for pickup. Arrived at her house at the exact time I had predicted. And then I waited, and waited and waited. After 5 minutes, I located her call back number on the cell's call history.

"Hello?"
"Hi, is this the person who needed a cab at XXX Street?"
"Oh, great. I'll be out in one second."

And then I waited, and waited and waited. When another 5 minutes had passed, I left for another call.

10 minutes later she calls back.

"I'm sorry. I got delayed. Would you please send the cab back for me? I'm ready to go now."
"No."
"Excuse me?"
"I said no."
"But I really need to get to YYY Street."
"I am sure you do but I have sent a cab there once. You didn't come out. You were given a courtesy call and you still didn't come out. The cab left to attend to others needing our services. We are too busy to waste our time on retries. Sorry."
"I'll make it worth you while."
"I doubt that."
"You're a fucking prick!"
"Not in a long time, ma'am. Not in a very long time."
[click]

A bit after 1:00am a guy calls from LAB, needing a vehicle that can haul two bicycles from there to the Southpointe Apartments. I told him to be on the curb next to Life's A Beach and the cab would be there in less than 5 minutes. Gave Kimo the call. He is there in 2 minutes and waits and waits and waits. Parking/Standing/Stopping is illegal at LAB, road is too narrow, but the cop's don't push the issue very often. It is also a very dangerous location. Cars come around the corner extremely fast and we are blocking their travel lane. We haven't been rear-ended yet but all of us have had some close calls. Kimo finally pulls off the curb and waits in the FoodLand parking lot directly across from LAB. No one ever comes out. When 5 minutes had passed I gave him another call. 40 minutes later the guy calls back and wants to be picked up at the Tiki Lounge. By this time both Kimo and Alex were on what should be their final trips of the night. They both drive the large Chevrolet Astrovans which are the only vehicles in our fleet capable of handling bicycles. It is against company policy for the sedan (#19) to carry one, let alone two, bikes.

"Sorry, sir. I have already dispatched a cab to you once and you never came out."
"Yeah, I know. We decided to have a few more drinks."
"I understand. However, when we are busy, we do not dispatch a cab for a second time for the same run."
"So you're not sending me a cab?"
"That is correct."
"How do I get my bikes home?"
"I would suggest pedaling as a good start."
"You're a real asshole!"
"No, sir. I am a PERFECT asshole."
[click]

---

THE PICTURE GALLERY

HONOLULU ZOO

Main Entrance

Southern Ground-Hornbill

American Alligator

Black And White Ruffed Lemur

Children's Zoo

Chimpanzee

Crowned Crane

Galapagos Tortoise

Gharial

***

"Let's all be careful out there!"