DAILY CHUCKLE 9-021

"Let's all be careful out there!"

JANUARY 20TH

Today is Tuesday, Jan. 20, the 20th day of 2009.
There are 345 days left in the year.

Today's Highlight in History:

• On Jan. 20, 1981, Iran released 52 Americans it had held hostage for 444 days, minutes after the presidency passed from Jimmy Carter to Ronald Reagan.

On this date:

• In 1801, Secretary of State John Marshall was nominated by President John Adams to be chief justice of the United States. (He was sworn in on Feb. 4, 1801.)
• In 1841, the island of Hong Kong was ceded by China to Great Britain. (It returned to Chinese control in July 1997.)
• In 1887, the U.S. Senate approved an agreement to lease Pearl Harbor in Hawaii as a naval base.
• In 1936, Britain's King George V died (his demise having been hastened by his physician); he was succeeded by Edward VIII.
• In 1937, President Franklin D. Roosevelt became the first chief executive to be inaugurated on Jan. 20 instead of March 4.
• In 1942, Nazi officials held the notorious Wannsee conference, during which they arrived at their "final solution" that called for exterminating Jews.
• In 1945, President Franklin D. Roosevelt was sworn into office for an unprecedented fourth term.
• In 1949, President Harry S. Truman was sworn in for a second term of office. In his inaugural address, Truman branded communism a "false philosophy" as he outlined his program for U.S. world leadership.
• In 1969, Richard M. Nixon was sworn in as the 37th president of the United States; Spiro Agnew took the oath of vice president.
• In 1989, George H.W. Bush was sworn in as the 41st president of the United States; Dan Quayle took the oath of vice president.

Ten years ago:

• For a second day, President Bill Clinton's legal team argued its case before the Senate, saying that House-passed articles of impeachment were "flawed and unfair."

Five years ago:

• President George W. Bush, in his State of the Union address, asserted that America was strengthening its economy and successfully combatting terrorism.
• Dick Gephardt quit the Democratic presidential race.
• Martha Stewart's stock-trading trial formally began in New York. (Stewart ended up serving a five-month prison sentence for lying about a stock sale.)
• The Salvation Army announced a donation likely to exceed $1.5 billion from the estate of Joan Kroc, widow of McDonald's founder.

One year ago:

• The Los Angeles Times announced its top editor, James O'Shea, had been fired after he rejected a management order to cut $4 million from the newsroom budget, 14 months after his predecessor was also ousted in a budget dispute.
• Georgian President Mikhail Saakashvili was sworn in for a second term.
• The New England Patriots defeated the San Diego Chargers in the AFC championship game, pulling out a 21-12 victory that sent them back to the Super Bowl for the fourth time in seven seasons.
• The New York Giants won a 23-20 overtime victory over Green Bay in the NFC championship.

Today's Birthdays:

• Country singer Slim Whitman is 85.
• Actress Patricia Neal is 83.
• Comedian Arte Johnson is 80.
• Former astronaut Buzz Aldrin is 79.
• Actress Dorothy Provine is 72.
• Singer Eric Stewart is 64.
• Movie director David Lynch is 63.
• Actor Daniel Benzali is 59.
• Rock musician Paul Stanley (KISS) is 57.
• Rock musician Ian Hill (Judas Priest) is 57.
• Comedian Bill Maher is 53.
• Actor Lorenzo Lamas is 51.
• Actor James Denton ("Desperate Housewives") is 46.
• Rock musician Greg K. (The Offspring) is 44.
• Country singer John Michael Montgomery is 44.
• Actor Rainn Wilson ("The Office") is 43.
• Actress Stacey Dash is 42.
• TV personality Melissa Rivers is 41.
• Singer Xavier is 41.
• Singer Edwin McCain is 39.
• Actor Skeet Ulrich is 39.
• Rap musician ?uestlove (questlove) (The Roots) is 38.
• Rock musician Rob Bourdon (Linkin Park) is 30.
• Actor Evan Peters is 22.

Thought for Today:

"America is great because she is good. If America ceases to be good, America will cease to be great."
Alexis de Tocqueville, French author (1805-1859).

"Let's all be careful out there!"

DAILY CHUCKLE 9-020

"Let's all be careful out there!"

JANUARY 19TH

Today is Monday, Jan. 19, the 19th day of 2009.
There are 346 days left in the year.
This is Martin Luther King Jr. Day.

Today's Highlight in History:

• On Jan. 19, 1809, author, poet and critic Edgar Allan Poe was born in Boston.

On this date:

• In 1736, James Watt, inventor of the steam engine, was born in Scotland.
• In 1807, Confederate Gen. Robert E. Lee was born in Westmoreland County, Va.
• In 1853, Giuseppe Verdi's opera "Il Trovatore" premiered in Rome.
• In 1861, Georgia seceded from the Union.
• In 1937, millionaire Howard Hughes set a transcontinental air record by flying his monoplane from Los Angeles to Newark, N.J., in seven hours, 28 minutes and 25 seconds.
• In 1944, the federal government relinquished control of the nation's railroads following settlement of a wage dispute.
• In 1955, a presidential news conference was filmed for television for the first time, with the permission of President Dwight D. Eisenhower.
• In 1966, Indira Gandhi was elected prime minister of India.
• In 1970, President Richard M. Nixon nominated G. Harrold Carswell to the Supreme Court; however, the nomination was defeated because of controversy over Carswell's past racial views.
• In 1979, former Attorney General John N. Mitchell was released on parole after serving 19 months at a federal prison in Alabama.

Ten years ago:

• President Bill Clinton delivered his State of the Union address, in which he proposed to protect Social Security by using huge budget surpluses and announced the government would sue the tobacco industry for smokers' health costs.
• Hours earlier, at the president's impeachment trial in the Senate, White House Counsel Charles Ruff opened the defense with ringing statements of Clinton's innocence.

Five years ago:

• John Kerry won Iowa's Democratic caucuses, while John Edwards placed second; Howard Dean, who finished third, delivered a fist-pumping, bellowing concession speech that was viewed as politically damaging.
• A freighter capsized near the western Norwegian port of Bergen, killing 18.

One year ago:

• Republican John McCain won a hard-fought South Carolina primary; Democrats Hillary Rodham Clinton and Barack Obama split the spoils in the Nevada caucuses.
• A soldier was killed south of Baghdad in a roadside bomb attack; his was the first American death to occur on a newly introduced, heavily armored vehicle known as MRAP.
• Death claimed actress Suzanne Pleshette in Los Angeles at age 70; John Stewart, a former member of the Kingston Trio, in San Diego at age 68; and former Chicago Mayor Eugene Sawyer at age 73.

Today's Birthdays:

• Actress Jean Stapleton is 86.
• Actor Fritz Weaver is 83.
• Actress Tippi Hedren is 79.
• Former PBS newsman Robert MacNeil is 78.
• Movie director Richard Lester is 77.
• Singer Phil Everly is 70.
• Actor-singer Michael Crawford is 67.
• Actress Shelley Fabares is 65.
• Country singer Dolly Parton is 63.
• ABC newswoman Ann Compton is 62.
• TV chef Paula Deen is 62.
• Rock singer Martha Davis is 58.
• Singer Dewey Bunnell (America) is 57.
• Actor Desi Arnaz Jr. is 56.
• Comedian Paul Rodriguez is 54.
• Actress Katey Sagal is 52.
• Reggae musician Mickey Virtue (UB40) is 52.
• Actor Paul McCrane is 48.
• Actor William Ragsdale is 48.
• Tennis player Stefan Edberg is 43.
• Rock singer Whitfield Crane (Ugly Kid Joe) is 41.
• Singer Trey Lorenz is 40.
• Rock singer-musician John Wozniak (Marcy Playground) is 38.
• Actress Drea de Matteo is 37.
• Comedian-impressionist Frank Caliendo is 35.
• Actress Marsha Thomason is 33.
• Actress Jodie Sweetin is 27.
• Actor Logan Lerman is 17.

Thought for Today:

"Words have no power to impress the mind without the exquisite horror of their reality."
Edgar Allan Poe (1809-1849).

"Let's all be careful out there!"

DAILY CHUCKLE 9-019

"Let's all be careful out there!"

JANUARY 18TH

Today is Sunday, Jan. 18, the 18th day of 2009.
There are 347 days left in the year.

Today's Highlight in History:

• On Jan. 18, 1919, the Paris Peace Conference, held to negotiate peace treaties ending World War I, opened in Versailles, France.

On this date:

• In 1778, English navigator Captain James Cook reached the Hawaiian Islands, which he dubbed the "Sandwich Islands."
• In 1862, the 10th president of the United States, John Tyler, died in Richmond, Va., at age 71.
• In 1892, comedian Oliver Hardy was born in Harlem, Ga.
• In 1904, actor Cary Grant was born Archibald Leach in Bristol, England.
• In 1911, the first landing of an aircraft on a ship took place as pilot Eugene B. Ely brought his Curtiss biplane in for a safe landing on the deck of the USS Pennsylvania in San Francisco Harbor.
• In 1943, during World War II, the Soviets announced they'd broken through the long Nazi siege of Leningrad. (It was another year before the siege was fully lifted.) A wartime ban on the sale of pre-sliced bread in the U.S. — aimed at reducing bakeries' demand for metal replacement parts — went into effect.
• In 1949, Charles Ponzi, engineer of one of the most spectacular swindles in history, died destitute in the charity ward of a hospital in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, at age 66.
• In 1957, a trio of B-52s completed the first nonstop, round-the-world flight by jet planes, landing at March Air Force Base in California after more than 45 hours aloft.
• In 1967, Albert DeSalvo, who claimed to be the "Boston Strangler," was convicted in Cambridge, Mass., of armed robbery, assault and sex offenses. (Sentenced to life, DeSalvo was killed in prison in 1973.)
• In 1990, a jury in Los Angeles acquitted former preschool operators Raymond Buckey and his mother, Peggy McMartin Buckey, of 52 child molestation charges.

Ten years ago:

• Defying global outrage over the massacre of 45 ethnic Albanian civilians in Kosovo, Serb forces pounded villages with artillery.
• The Yugoslav government also ordered the American head of the Kosovo peace mission to leave the country and barred a U.N. investigator who was looking into the massacre.

Five years ago:

• A suicide truck bombing outside the headquarters of the U.S.-led coalition in Baghdad killed at least 31 people.
• A 15-day hostage drama began at the Arizona State Prison Complex-Lewis near Buckeye, where two inmates attempting to escape took two correctional officers hostage. (One guard was released midway through the ordeal; the other, Lois Fraley, was held the entire time, during which she was raped and beaten.)
• The New England Patriots earned their second trip to the Super Bowl in three seasons by defeating the Indianapolis Colts 24-14 in the AFC championship game; the Carolina Panthers defeated the Philadelphia Eagles, 14-3, in the NFC championship game.

One year ago:

• With recession fears rising and the stock market tumbling, President George W. Bush called for up to $150 billion in tax relief for consumers and business, saying there was no time to waste.
• Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon designated George Clooney a U.N. "messenger of peace" to promote the world body's activities.
• Actress Lois Nettleton died in Woodland Hills, Calif., at age 80.

Today's Birthdays:

• Movie director John Boorman is 76.
• Singer-songwriter Bobby Goldsboro is 68.
• Comedian-singer-musician Brett Hudson is 56.
• Actor-director Kevin Costner is 54.
• Country singer Mark Collie is 53.
• Actress Jane Horrocks is 45.
• Comedian Dave Attell is 44.
• Actor Jesse L. Martin is 40.
• Rapper DJ Quik is 39.
• Rock singer Jonathan Davis (Korn) is 38.
• Singer Christian Burns (BBMak) is 36.
• Actor Derek Richardson is 33.
• Actor Jason Segel is 29.
• Actress Samantha Mumba is 26.
• Country singer Kristy Lee Cook (TV: "American Idol") is 25.

Thought for Today:

"Look for a long time at what pleases you, and for a longer time at what pains you."
Colette, French author (1873-1954).

"Let's all be careful out there!"

DAILY CHUCKLE 9-018

;00 A
"Let's all be careful out there!"

JANUARY 17TH

Today is Saturday, Jan. 17, the 17th day of 2009.
There are 348 days left in the year.

Today's Highlight in History:

• On Jan. 17, 1961, in his farewell address, President Dwight D. Eisenhower warned against the rise of "the military-industrial complex."

On this date:

• In 1562, French Protestants were recognized under the Edict of St. Germain.
• In 1893, the 19th president of the United States, Rutherford B. Hayes, died in Fremont, Ohio, at age 70; Hawaii's monarchy was overthrown as a group of businessmen and sugar planters forced Queen Lili'uokalani to abdicate.
• In 1917, the United States paid Denmark $25 million for the Virgin Islands.
• In 1945, Soviet and Polish forces liberated Warsaw during World War II; Swedish diplomat Raoul Wallenberg, credited with saving tens of thousands of Jews, disappeared in Hungary while in Soviet custody.
• In 1946, the United Nations Security Council held its first meeting, in London.
• In 1966, a U.S. Air Force B-52 carrying four unarmed hydrogen bombs crashed on the Spanish coast. (Three of the bombs were quickly recovered, but the fourth wasn't recovered until April.)
• In 1977, convicted murderer Gary Gilmore, 36, was shot by a firing squad at Utah State Prison in the first U.S. execution in a decade.
• In 1989, five children were shot to death at the Cleveland Elementary School in Stockton, Calif., by a drifter, Patrick Purdy, who then killed himself.
• In 1994, a 6.7 magnitude earthquake struck Southern California, killing at least 72 people.
• In 1995, more than 6,000 people were killed when an earthquake with a magnitude of 7.2 devastated the city of Kobe, Japan.

Ten years ago:

• As White House lawyers met to work on President Bill Clinton's defense, their client spent the day preparing for his State of the Union address.
• The defending Super Bowl champion Denver Broncos defeated the New York Jets, 23-10, to win the American Football Conference title; the Atlanta Falcons upset the Minnesota Vikings, 30-27, to win the National Football Conference championship.

Five years ago:

• Three U.S. soldiers were killed north of Baghdad, pushing the U.S. death toll in the Iraq conflict to 500.
• Hollywood producer Ray Stark died at age 88.

One year ago:

• Bobby Fischer, the chess master who became a Cold War icon when he dethroned the Soviet Union's Boris Spassky as world champion in 1972, died in Reykjavik, Iceland, at age 64.
• Character actor Allan Melvin died in Los Angeles at age 84.

Today's Birthdays:

• Actress Betty White is 87.
• Actor James Earl Jones is 78.
• Talk show host Maury Povich is 70.
• Former heavyweight boxing champion Muhammad Ali is 67.
• Pop singer Chris Montez is 67.
• Rhythm-and-blues singer William Hart (The Delfonics) is 64.
• Rock musician Mick Taylor is 61.
• Rhythm-and-blues singer Sheila Hutchinson (The Emotions) is 56.
  
• Singer Steve Earle is 54.
• Singer Paul Young is 53.
• Actor-comedian Steve Harvey is 52.
• Singer Susanna Hoffs (The Bangles) is 50.
• Actor-comedian Jim Carrey is 47.
• Future first lady Michelle Obama is 45.
• Actor Joshua Malina is 43.
• Singer Shabba Ranks is 43.
• Actor Naveen Andrews is 40.
• Rapper Kid Rock is 38.
• Actor Freddy Rodriguez is 34.
• Actress Zooey Deschanel is 29.
• Singer Ray J is 28.
• Country singer Amanda Wilkinson is 27.

Thought for Today:

"The course of history can be changed but not halted."
Paul Robeson, American actor, singer and civil rights activist (1898-1976).

"Let's all be careful out there!"